Wednesday, 27 December 2006


Following on from yesterday’s blog. More about the Tesco’s Rich Chocolate Fudge Yule Log. Boy am I in trouble! The wife caught me trying to get rid of what's left by feeding it to her dog. Accused me of poisoning her darling Poppet. I pleaded with her that it was too sweet to eat. She said I should pour natural yogurt over it to make it sour. The woman must really hate me, what a concoction - don’t try it, its absolutely vile. But what am I to do, I’m not allowed to throw what’s left away? Is it my Karma?

I’ve already had my say, about the TV programmes shown this Christmas. But I must have my final grump. Logic would have it, the more TV channels there are, greater the choice, the higher the chance of getting a programme I want to see. But it doesn’t work that way. The more channels there are, the more frustrated I get in not finding a single programme I want to see. But, ####, fart, to turn the knife in the wound - the more channels there are, the higher the chance, when there is a good programme on I want to see, there will be good programmes on at least four other channels. Two good programmes - watch one record the other - but four good programmes, bloody frustration. Also, also, when there is a choice, with the channel selector in hand I spend time switching between channels - the result I never see one complete programme. Is this some form of punishment?

Talking about punishment, I overheard two women talking. One said she was glad there hadn’t been any big disaster this Christmas - there always seems to be planes crashing, boats or ferries sinking and two years ago there was the Tsunami. The other said “Thank God”. What did she mean?

What did she think - is God a cantankerous Grumpy Old Fart who vents his spleen by raining havoc down on the human race?

“Got a bloody hangover. What can I do? I know I’ll punish the human race. Heads it’s a Natural disaster, tails it’s a plane crash”.

This isn’t a fanciful idea; even the law recognises “Acts of God”. Something happens, your house gets damaged, you claim on your insurance policy - sorry you’re not covered for damage caused by “Acts of God”.

The idea of God is ingrained deep in our psyche. Even atheists in times of stress will exclaim, “oh God“, or “please God”. Totally irrational but that’s how it is.

Did God have such a lousy Christmas that He is venting His anger by making me eat the rest of the Tesco’s Rich Chocolate Fudge Yule Log?

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