Thursday 21 December 2006

Horny Goat Complex Herbal Pills and Bad Feet

Following yesterday’s blog, I received a very cryptic message about Horny Goat complex herbal pills. Took it to be a suggestion to stop people parking too close to my car.

Have you seen the way an old Billy goat behaves when he gets excited - pees all over himself, and what a smell?

Who would want to park next to someone who pees over himself?

Come to think about it most old men already have problems with the water works.

Or had I got it completely wrong, and it was a suggestion that I should crush the pills and rub them on my feet?

Googled Horny Goat Weed and looked up:

www.evitamins.com/pr...

Didn't bother to read the description of what it’s used for - too many words.

But under - Recommended Use:

“As a dietary supplement, take two capsules daily. May be taken 60-90 minutes prior to physical exertion“.


So it is efficacious for the old feet.

Went to the local super market, the girl at the inquiry counter said they didn’t stock Horny Goat Weed. She suggested I tried the pet shop.

Woman in pet shop called me a dirty old man. And told me to leave the shop. Odd behaviour.

Tried the Chemist, very nice young lady behind the counter smiled and winked (perhaps she had dust in her eye). Told her I wanted it for my feet - peculiar reaction, she giggled. If she had my feet she wouldn’t laugh.

By the time I got home my feet were killing me, so thought I’d take double the recommended dose.

Unexpected reaction, it did nothing for my feet but I felt an overwhelming desire to head butt the door. Also some strange stirrings in the nether region.

Caught the wife reading the pill bottle, she smiled and had a twinkle in her eye. Said she wanted to show me something in the bedroom.
A combination of the wife and the side affects of Horny Goat Weed - no energy left to type.

Don’t know if my feet are better, I got no feeling from the waist down.

2 comments:

dyfynkus said...

Hello, yesbut. It's nice to see you have found an outlet away from the hub-bub of the message boards. I too am elsewhere in a far less aggressive place. You can find me at http://uk.myspace.com/dyfynkus if you wish. Happy Christmas.

Anonymous said...

I can hardly type for the tears of laughter,nice one G&F
arealfarmer