Free newspapers

Free newspapers serve three purposes:

1. To increase the risk of global warming, resulting from the number of trees that have to be cut down to provide the paper.
2. To incease litter in the streets and public transport when copies are discarded.
3. To mask the inefficiency of the National Health Service appointments system.

They serve no other purpose.

You have an appointment to see a doctor at 11:20, (not 11:15 or 11:30 but precisely 11:20). Don’t kid yourself all appointments are created by a random number generator and are pure fiction. Turn up by 11:20 and if you are lucky you’ll see the doctor at 12:30. When he’s in a rush to get rid of you so that he can go for lunch. But that’s where the free newspapers comes into play. Left around the waiting room, you pick it up and turn to the Sudoku - caught again, concentrating on the puzzle you don’t notice time passing.

Yesterday I finished the Sudoku. All the magazines in the waiting room were pre World War 2, so I had no alternative but to read the paper - I use the word ‘read’ loosely. Turned the page, and my blood pressure shot through the roof. There in the paper was a photo of the face that was on TV screen every day during the months leading up to the Iraq war.

Supercilious, arrogant, lying, those are only the flattering epithets for Geoff “would you buy a second hand car from me” Hoon, the Minister of Defence at the time Britain went to war in Afghanistan and Iraq. He was giving a “60 Second Interview”.

The first question was . . .Sorry I can’t even think about this heap of steaming dog excrement’s opinions. Only to say, in his opinion the Iraq insertion was a success. Asked why, if it was a success there are still British troops in Iraq? He replied, “The aftermath has been more difficult than expected”.

Its just like a surgeon saying, “Mrs Blogs, I have good news for you and not so good news. The good news is we successfully removed your husbands ingrown toe nail. The not so good news, he bled to death".

Now I can’t make up my mind, is this pathetic excuse of a politician so dim-witted that he thinks Iraq was a success, or does he think that we are so stupid we will believe him? The only glimmer of hope is at least we will soon be free of Blair.

I must finish with a classic quote from the interview.

What’s Donald Rumsfeld like?

Hoon: “He’s very straightforward. He said what he thought. He was always very clear.”


Rumsfeld the man that sounds like a maladroit randomly farting Babel Fish

• There are speeches I have made
• There are speeches I haven’t made
• There are speeches I have made which I should have made.
• There are speeches I have made which I shouldn’t have made.
• There are speeches I haven’t made which I should have made.
• There are speeches I haven’t made which I shouldn’t have made.
• There are speeches I know I have made
• There are speeches I know haven’t made
• There are speeches I know I have made which I should have made.
• There are speeches I know I have made which I shouldn’t have made.
• There are speeches I know I haven’t made which I should have made.
• There ar speeches I haven't made which I should have made
• There are speeches I don’t know haven’t made
• There are speeches I don’t know I have made which I should have made.
• There are speeches I don’t know I have made which I shouldn’t have made.
• There are speeches I don’t know I haven’t made which I should have made.
• There are speeches I don’t know I haven’t made which I shouldn’t have made.

Click here to see why I am so very very confused

Have medical prescription will travel

On 1st April NHS Prescription charges in England increased to £6.85 per item. On the same date medical prescription charges in Wales were scraped.

If you live in London and have more than three items on a prescription, it will be cheaper to buy an Advanced Return train ticket and travel to Cardiff to obtain your prescribed medication, than go to your local pharmacy..

Sunday there was a program on BBC Radio 4 “Battle for Birth”, looking at the history of maternity practice in the NHS. Even within the last thirty years expectant mothers, as a matter of routine had to suffer the indignity of being shaved and given an enema. It was NHS policy for all women to give birth in Maternity Hospitals; and they were not allowed out of bed for two weeks after giving birth. How things have changed; today because of financial constraints 9 out of 10 NHS Health Trusts in England and Wales cannot afford to run antenatal classes. A recent survey by the Royal College of Midwives revealed two-thirds of maternity units are understaffed and an additional 3000 midwives need to be recruited.

NHS National Health Service is a misnomer, it should be PCHS Postal Code Health Service.

Political Parasites

So Tony Blair is spending the New Year in Bee Gees star Robin Gibb’s Florida mansion. He spends his summer holidays in Cliff Richard’s Barbados mansion. You must question his actions. But at the same time be sorry for him. He must have a perverted taste in music.

Does Blair have any sense of probity? He cadges holidays from has-been pop stars, and sells peerages to get money for the Labour party.

They “the Establishment” says the poor political parties have been forced to “bend” the law to get finances - it would be better if tax payers funded the parties. Let’s just think about this. The political parties, who do not care a toss about public opinion, now want us to finance them to ignore us. The measure of popularity of a party should be measured not only by the votes it gets at elections, but also by the number of people it attracts to become members. If a political party cannot gain sufficient support to finance its activities it doesn’t deserve to survive. And where does most of the money get spent? On advertising at General Elections. Cut out all the name calling at election time and save money.

Though if a law is past to finance political parties, it would be tempting to start the Grumpy and Farting Party (the GFP).

But who would want to become a member of a political party? Especially a party which has Hazel Blear as its Chairman ( I mean New Labour, not the Grumpy & Farting Party). Last week she was leading a protest at the planned closure of a hospital in her Salford constituency. What’s wrong with that you might ask? Surely it’s the duty of every MP to fight for the services provided in their constituency? Yes, but. Hazel Blear is a member of the Cabinet which took the decision to rationalize the National Health Service, which resulted in the planned closure. If Blear is opposed to the cuts, then she should on principle resign from the Government. But no, she will not do that, because she craves power. So why did she attend the protest and risk the wroth of Tony Blair? Simply, currently there are three Parliamentary constituencies in the Salford area. Under the reorganization of boundaries these will be reduced to two. So, poor Hazel is at risk of loosing here job. (Gloat, snigger). But Hazel is determined it will be one of the other two MPs who will be ousted.

Hazel ##### Blear, I can’t stand that woman. When she is interviewed she never answers any questions. During one programme she was determined the only message she wanted to get across was: to rubbish David Cameron, the leader of the Conservative Party.

Q: “Did the Prime Minister in his speech finally endorse Gordon Brown?”
HB: “Cameron is weak and never taken decisions”

Q: “Do you support Gordon Brown to be the next Leader?”
HB: “Cameron is weak and never taken decisions”


Q: “Are you going to stand for the post of Deputy Leader?”
HB: “Cameron is weak and never taken decisions”


Q: “ . . . . . . ?”
HB, “Cameron is weak, and never taken decisions”

And on and on.

Lets face it most people consider all politicians are a waste of space. Unless you are Cliff Richard or Robin Gibb, who are pleased to find space for their number one fan and his family.

National Health Service

Why does the National Health Service (NHS) bother to give times for appointments?

In the doctors surgery there’s a notice to say how many patients fail to keep their appointment. Last month it was 9.2%. Not surprising you have to wait so long for an appointment, by the time it comes, either the complaint has cleared or you are dead.

You have to wait months for a hospital appointment.

On one occasion I had to queue for 1 hour to make a hospital appointment only to be told they had lost my files and I would have to come back the next day to make an appointment.

You turn up early for your 10.00 am hospital appointment, and if you are lucky you might see the doctor by 11.30. Then you are told you have to allow 10 days for the result of the consultation to be sent to your GP.

So you make an appointment for 9.30 to see your GP; 10.45 you see the doctor, results, what results??

Five times I had blood tests taken, because on each occasion the results were lost.

The NHS is spending £3 billion on a new IT system. £3 billion that’s £3,000,000,000. Haven’t they heard of Hotmail which they could use to send results? Why does it take 10 days, even a pigeon could walk from to the hospital to the GP surgery in half the time?