At the weekend the Director of NASA’s World Population Survey Programme (WPSP), had to admit all results published since 2005 were incorrect. This was due to a computer program glitch. The survey is performed by taking satellite images of every square metre of the Earths land surface. A count of the number of people seen at a location is used to predict the number of unseen people, i.e. those not directly visible to the satellite. Unfortunately no allowance had been made in the program for anomalies.
Regrettably the survey for London was done during the visit of the Chinese State Circus; an image of a Chinese acrobat with ten colleagues standing on his shoulder distorted the population density figures (PDFs) for central London. These were further distorted by incorporating into the final statistics PDFs based on the survey of Trafalgar Square taken the day after England had won the Ashes. The Director did point out validation of the survey results was performed using 2003 results, which coincidentally coincided with the return of the English Rugby team after winning the Rugby World Cup.
The Director announced the population of London is 12.56% less than previously stated, and 8.07% less for the whole of the UK.
Commenting on NASA’s statement, a Home Office spokesperson said:
“These figures confirm our own survey results, that the influx of Polish immigrants was grossly overestimated. In fact to date Home Office records show only 23 Polish nationals have entered the country since 2005. Though there are boxes with data awaiting validation”
Dr John Read stated he had asked Home Office officials what he should know, and was told nothing.
New Labour’s Chairman, Hazel Blear, stated at a protest against closing her local hospital.
“I am very pleased that such a renowned organisation as NASA has provided unequivocally evidence of this Government’s achievements since 1997. The National Health Service is safe in this Governments hands. Further let it be a warning for those who think David Cameron is capable of making hard decisions”
A spokesperson for Friends of the Earth said:
“The decrease in the population of London confirms the existence of global warming. Fair skinned residents of London have had to move north to prevent sun burns.”
Liberty’s Director Shami Chakrabarti interviewed on BBC demanded a Public Enquiry into the missing persons. She stated this was yet further proof of the USA Extraordinary-Rendition Program.
Asked what steps would be taken to prevent a similar errors, NASA’s WPSP Director stated, surveys would not be performed on the day the English Cricket Team returned from Australia, or from the ICC Cricket World Cup, or on the day the England Rugby Team returns from the Rugby World Cup, as the results would underestimate Central London’s population.
Monday, 15 January 2007
Sunday, 14 January 2007
Dangerous Fingers
When I am looking at a web page and it asks, “Do you want to send a message?” I click on yes, and somehow a little box pops-up for me to type a message. It shows the message will be sent from my internet provider email account. But I never use that account, it attracts SPAM like cow shit attracts flies. I want to use my Googlemail account.
This morning I was looking at resetting the default setting, or whatever the correct expression is. Don’t know what I did, but next thing I know a box pops up with that bar which shows the progress of installing something. There to my horror was: Internet Explorer being uninstalled, Internet Explorer uninstalled, Outlook Express being uninstalled followed by Outlook Express uninstalled. Panic (an understatement of what I was feeling at that moment).
Clicked on Start then tried to open Set Program Access and Defaults nothing. Now I really was pannicing. It looked as if I had completely wiped from my computer Outlook Express (which wasn’t such a tragic event as I do not use it), and Internet Explorer (which I do use). Not the way to start a day. No good swearing at the computer, never does any good, invariably results in the computer sulking and going on strike for the rest of the day. The normal thing to do is switch the computer off and on again, but in this case it could result in the computer when shutting down saving the new unwanted settings.
Kept my head, went onto Jezza’s Exiles Online Message Board, Technical/Computer & Web Links. Left a message requesting help. Within minutes Ian Mac had posted the solution, and I recovered the programs. What a relief. But I never learn. I keep clicking on things I shouldn’t just to see what happens. In my case disaster. But in the case of pubescent geegs they get deep into the heart of some highly restricted and allegedly highly secure system.
Is it an age thing? Are grumpy and farting old fogies incapable of understanding the intricacies of computers?
This morning I was looking at resetting the default setting, or whatever the correct expression is. Don’t know what I did, but next thing I know a box pops up with that bar which shows the progress of installing something. There to my horror was: Internet Explorer being uninstalled, Internet Explorer uninstalled, Outlook Express being uninstalled followed by Outlook Express uninstalled. Panic (an understatement of what I was feeling at that moment).
Clicked on Start then tried to open Set Program Access and Defaults nothing. Now I really was pannicing. It looked as if I had completely wiped from my computer Outlook Express (which wasn’t such a tragic event as I do not use it), and Internet Explorer (which I do use). Not the way to start a day. No good swearing at the computer, never does any good, invariably results in the computer sulking and going on strike for the rest of the day. The normal thing to do is switch the computer off and on again, but in this case it could result in the computer when shutting down saving the new unwanted settings.
Kept my head, went onto Jezza’s Exiles Online Message Board, Technical/Computer & Web Links. Left a message requesting help. Within minutes Ian Mac had posted the solution, and I recovered the programs. What a relief. But I never learn. I keep clicking on things I shouldn’t just to see what happens. In my case disaster. But in the case of pubescent geegs they get deep into the heart of some highly restricted and allegedly highly secure system.
Is it an age thing? Are grumpy and farting old fogies incapable of understanding the intricacies of computers?
Saturday, 13 January 2007
East of Suez
Yesterday Tony Blair gave a speech on the role of the UK’s Armed Forces in the 21st century.
Our Nation’s Future - Defence
http://www.number-10.gov.uk/output/Page10735.asp
I quote one paragraph:
Great Britain ceased being a true World Power 1941 when it required USA assistance to defeat Germany.
It emerged from World War 2 still thinking and trying to act as a World Power.
It took another ten years, and the failed attempt in 1956 to regain control of the Suez Canal and to topple Nasser, for the World to know Great Britain was no longer a World Power..
It took a further ten years, and the Labour Government of 1966 to drop the pretence of being a World Power. And the policy was put in place to by 1971 withdraw troops from East of Suez.
Subsequent Governments still tried to act, if not as a World Power, but certainly as a Country with influence on the World Stage. This pretence was supported by two props: the permanent seat and veto at the UN Security Council, and being a nuclear power.
For the next twenty years, irrespective of the public posturing, Governments knew their limitations and acted accordingly. There was a series of Defence Reviews, each resulting in the downsizing of the Armed Forces.
In 1997 New Labour won the General election, within a year Tony Blair had taken the Country into the first of five Wars.
At the start of 2007 Great Britain has troops on operational deployment in: Iraq, Afghanistan, Bosnia & Kosovo, Northern Ireland together with various UN missions. Blair is determined Britain should remain a nuclear power. But his latest speech is an attempt to roll back the years, and once again put on “The Emperors Cloths” of a World Power. We will once again try to influence events East of Suez. And to achieve this with a poorly paid, inadequately equipped, abysmally housed armed forces.
Blair, as one last desperate attempt to salvage his image and leave some heritage, has called for a great debate on Britain’s foreign policy. The big question is not Britain’s foreign policy but Blair’s powers of judgement?
Our Nation’s Future - Defence
http://www.number-10.gov.uk/output/Page10735.asp
I quote one paragraph:
The frontiers of our security no longer stop at the Channel. What happens in the Middle East affects us. What happens in Pakistan; or Indonesia; or in the attenuated struggles for territory and supremacy in Africa for example, in Sudan or Somalia. The new frontiers for our security are global. Our Armed Forces will be deployed in the lands of other nations far from home, with no immediate threat to our territory, in environments and in ways unfamiliar to them.
Great Britain ceased being a true World Power 1941 when it required USA assistance to defeat Germany.
It emerged from World War 2 still thinking and trying to act as a World Power.
It took another ten years, and the failed attempt in 1956 to regain control of the Suez Canal and to topple Nasser, for the World to know Great Britain was no longer a World Power..
It took a further ten years, and the Labour Government of 1966 to drop the pretence of being a World Power. And the policy was put in place to by 1971 withdraw troops from East of Suez.
Subsequent Governments still tried to act, if not as a World Power, but certainly as a Country with influence on the World Stage. This pretence was supported by two props: the permanent seat and veto at the UN Security Council, and being a nuclear power.
For the next twenty years, irrespective of the public posturing, Governments knew their limitations and acted accordingly. There was a series of Defence Reviews, each resulting in the downsizing of the Armed Forces.
In 1997 New Labour won the General election, within a year Tony Blair had taken the Country into the first of five Wars.
At the start of 2007 Great Britain has troops on operational deployment in: Iraq, Afghanistan, Bosnia & Kosovo, Northern Ireland together with various UN missions. Blair is determined Britain should remain a nuclear power. But his latest speech is an attempt to roll back the years, and once again put on “The Emperors Cloths” of a World Power. We will once again try to influence events East of Suez. And to achieve this with a poorly paid, inadequately equipped, abysmally housed armed forces.
Blair, as one last desperate attempt to salvage his image and leave some heritage, has called for a great debate on Britain’s foreign policy. The big question is not Britain’s foreign policy but Blair’s powers of judgement?
Friday, 12 January 2007
Fifteen Seconds of Sporting Fame
One of the Message Boards I post on has the thread “Sporting Claims To Fame”. Yesterday I posted the following:
Do you remember as kids, you would selected two teams to play cricket, there were always two kids left at the end: one with a physical disability, the other who couldn’t bat, bowl, run, catch or even stop a ball. The later was me. I suffered from the Sporting equivalent of dyslexia.
Well by pure chance I arranged a game of cricket with another gang of boys. There was a big debate, whether I should be included in the team. Some of the boys said yes because I had arranged the game, the others said no way. In the end I was allowed to play, not because I had arranged the game, but because the only alternative was a girl!
Our gang batted first; as usual I was bowled out first ball.
The captain knew I couldn’t catch or field, so it was pointless telling me where to field. Rather I was allowed to wander around day dreaming.
It came to the last two batsmen in with one run to get. The ball was hit hard to square leg. I still can hear the silence and incredulity as the fielders looked expecting to see the ball fly over the boundary. But there was no sign of the ball. All eyes passed back over the projected trajectory of the ball, until they saw me standing there with the ball stuck in my outstretched hand. As if in slow motion their faces changed from disappointment to elation as they realised I had caught the ball. The silence was broken by my “how’s that?“.
You would think that that would have been the start of a great cricketing career. But it wasn’t. Everybody knew it was a fluke, and I was never picked again. So I retired at the peak of my, albeit short, cricketing career.
Do you remember as kids, you would selected two teams to play cricket, there were always two kids left at the end: one with a physical disability, the other who couldn’t bat, bowl, run, catch or even stop a ball. The later was me. I suffered from the Sporting equivalent of dyslexia.
Well by pure chance I arranged a game of cricket with another gang of boys. There was a big debate, whether I should be included in the team. Some of the boys said yes because I had arranged the game, the others said no way. In the end I was allowed to play, not because I had arranged the game, but because the only alternative was a girl!
Our gang batted first; as usual I was bowled out first ball.
The captain knew I couldn’t catch or field, so it was pointless telling me where to field. Rather I was allowed to wander around day dreaming.
It came to the last two batsmen in with one run to get. The ball was hit hard to square leg. I still can hear the silence and incredulity as the fielders looked expecting to see the ball fly over the boundary. But there was no sign of the ball. All eyes passed back over the projected trajectory of the ball, until they saw me standing there with the ball stuck in my outstretched hand. As if in slow motion their faces changed from disappointment to elation as they realised I had caught the ball. The silence was broken by my “how’s that?“.
You would think that that would have been the start of a great cricketing career. But it wasn’t. Everybody knew it was a fluke, and I was never picked again. So I retired at the peak of my, albeit short, cricketing career.
Thursday, 11 January 2007
The Price of Leisure
The rain is lashing against the window - so I can’t go for a walk.
Nothing on TV.
Don’t feel like surfing the Net.
Might as well go back to bed.
How did people cope before the Net, TV or even radio? In reality they didn’t have much leisure time. It was more a case of surviving. Work filled most of the day. In the evenings, the men might go to a pub. Social events associated with religious institutions played a big part in women’s lives. Children were adept at entertaining themselves. There was no need to worry about how to pass their time in retirement - most didn’t live long enough to retire, (my Grandfather, my Father and two of his three brothers died before they were 65 yeas old).
How things have changed. Today, people work because of leisure. They work to put money into their pension fund. Then there’s the two foreign holidays taken each year, satellite TV, buying DVD’s, Broadband rental, attending football matches, the cinema, theatre, taking the kids out for a meal, mobile phones for themselves and the kids, the must have gadget, the must have designer cloths - all these have to be paid for. So people work so that they can be entertained in there limited periods of leisure.
One of the prices we pay is the loss of community. People are so busy, providing for their family, that they no longer have time to interact with their neighbours.
I might have related this story before -my cousin phoned, he was quite upset, he had failed to attend a neighbours funeral. He hadn’t heard that she had died. Yet less than thirty years ago, the whole street would have known within less than an hour of her death. Neighbours would have been out on the street talking, going to the house of the deceased offering help. The whole ritual surrounding death has changed. Now there are professional bearers to carry the coffin; years ago you would make your last journey to the grave on the shoulders of neighbours and friends.
I’m getting morbid, grumpy and farting. I’m going to bed.
Nothing on TV.
Don’t feel like surfing the Net.
Might as well go back to bed.
How did people cope before the Net, TV or even radio? In reality they didn’t have much leisure time. It was more a case of surviving. Work filled most of the day. In the evenings, the men might go to a pub. Social events associated with religious institutions played a big part in women’s lives. Children were adept at entertaining themselves. There was no need to worry about how to pass their time in retirement - most didn’t live long enough to retire, (my Grandfather, my Father and two of his three brothers died before they were 65 yeas old).
How things have changed. Today, people work because of leisure. They work to put money into their pension fund. Then there’s the two foreign holidays taken each year, satellite TV, buying DVD’s, Broadband rental, attending football matches, the cinema, theatre, taking the kids out for a meal, mobile phones for themselves and the kids, the must have gadget, the must have designer cloths - all these have to be paid for. So people work so that they can be entertained in there limited periods of leisure.
One of the prices we pay is the loss of community. People are so busy, providing for their family, that they no longer have time to interact with their neighbours.
I might have related this story before -my cousin phoned, he was quite upset, he had failed to attend a neighbours funeral. He hadn’t heard that she had died. Yet less than thirty years ago, the whole street would have known within less than an hour of her death. Neighbours would have been out on the street talking, going to the house of the deceased offering help. The whole ritual surrounding death has changed. Now there are professional bearers to carry the coffin; years ago you would make your last journey to the grave on the shoulders of neighbours and friends.
I’m getting morbid, grumpy and farting. I’m going to bed.
Wednesday, 10 January 2007
Entertaining bus journey
Yesterday morning, on the way back from the supermarket, at a bus-stop and a very attractive well dressed young black woman got on. She showed her bus pass to the driver and explained that it had run out and she was on the way to renew it. Behind her, in the queue trying to get on the bus, were two rotund women, I guess they were about 70 years old. It was obvious as soon as they spoke they were of Jamaican origin.
They were soon in full flow:
“Eh Girl, see she, dam fool think she get on bus with no pass.”
“Eh, you hear she, she say she pass run out on Sunday, she dam stupid ,today Tuesday.”
“Eh, come driver me and my friend wants go home, man this shopping heavy”.
“Dam stupid girl”.
Under the barrage, the young woman made a sheepish retreat off the bus.
For the next five minutes I heard outbursts from the back of the bus.
“Eh, Girl you see her coat, these young girls spend all money on cloths, and think driver give them free ride, dam stupid”.
They only stopped talking about her when the bus got caught in a traffic jam.
“Eh Girl, me wants to get home, where all dis traffic come from?”
“Me not know”.
After nearly half an hour of stop start progress, the cause of the traffic jam came into view. Four yards before traffic lights at a very busy road junction a car stood three feet out from the pavement. So instead of two traffic lanes at the lights there was only one.
“Eh Girl, dam stupid place to park car”.
“No Girl, car must have broke down.”
Next thing an old man came doddering and farting along the pavement. He tried to open the door of the car but it was locked. Next thing he started knocking the window, to wake his wife to open the door. The grumpy old fart had parked in the middle of the road while he had gone to the Post Office. My efforts as a Grumpy Old Fart to annoy people in supermarkets shrinks into insignificance compared to his actions.
Isn’t it nice to think, that even though you are in your twilight years, you can still bring traffic in a large city to a crawl.
They were soon in full flow:
“Eh Girl, see she, dam fool think she get on bus with no pass.”
“Eh, you hear she, she say she pass run out on Sunday, she dam stupid ,today Tuesday.”
“Eh, come driver me and my friend wants go home, man this shopping heavy”.
“Dam stupid girl”.
Under the barrage, the young woman made a sheepish retreat off the bus.
For the next five minutes I heard outbursts from the back of the bus.
“Eh, Girl you see her coat, these young girls spend all money on cloths, and think driver give them free ride, dam stupid”.
They only stopped talking about her when the bus got caught in a traffic jam.
“Eh Girl, me wants to get home, where all dis traffic come from?”
“Me not know”.
After nearly half an hour of stop start progress, the cause of the traffic jam came into view. Four yards before traffic lights at a very busy road junction a car stood three feet out from the pavement. So instead of two traffic lanes at the lights there was only one.
“Eh Girl, dam stupid place to park car”.
“No Girl, car must have broke down.”
Next thing an old man came doddering and farting along the pavement. He tried to open the door of the car but it was locked. Next thing he started knocking the window, to wake his wife to open the door. The grumpy old fart had parked in the middle of the road while he had gone to the Post Office. My efforts as a Grumpy Old Fart to annoy people in supermarkets shrinks into insignificance compared to his actions.
Isn’t it nice to think, that even though you are in your twilight years, you can still bring traffic in a large city to a crawl.
Tuesday, 9 January 2007
US Somali air strikes 'kill many'
The US has carried out at least two air strikes in southern Somalia against Islamist fighters, who the US believes include members of an al-Qaeda cell.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/6243459.stm
It appears if the US thinks it has justifiable reasons to bomb a country then it is justified.
Applying that logic, if I have a complaint against my neighbour playing their music too loud, I’m justified to enter their house and smash their Hi-fi.
Let us assume the top three al-Qaeda operatives in East Africa were staying in the village, does that justify the attack? Bombing a village was bound to result in killing innocent women and children, (obscenely referred to as “collateral damage” by the Americans). What is the acceptable level of collateral damage: one, two, ten children per Qaeda operative? Does the answer depend on whether they are American, European or African children?
Knowing the al-Qaeda operatives were in the village, why didn’t the Americas send in Special Forces to attack them? This would have minimised the loss of innocent lives. The answer is very simple - Black Hawk Down. The disastrous attack on Mogadishu in October 1993 and the subsequent humiliation for US troops has left a deep scar on the US psyche. No US General is going to sanction a similar mission. Attacks on Somali will be carried out at 30,000ft irrespective of the collateral damage.
Innocent men, women and children are being killed in Iraq, Afghanistan, Somalia and other countries, all in the name of the war against terrorism. Politicians say, “We are carrying the war to them”. In reality it means it’s acceptable to kill 1000 foreigners if it saves 1 life in the streets of London or New York.
What am I worth?
What level of collateral damage is justifiable, to ensure I am safe to walk the streets of London?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/6243459.stm
It appears if the US thinks it has justifiable reasons to bomb a country then it is justified.
Applying that logic, if I have a complaint against my neighbour playing their music too loud, I’m justified to enter their house and smash their Hi-fi.
Let us assume the top three al-Qaeda operatives in East Africa were staying in the village, does that justify the attack? Bombing a village was bound to result in killing innocent women and children, (obscenely referred to as “collateral damage” by the Americans). What is the acceptable level of collateral damage: one, two, ten children per Qaeda operative? Does the answer depend on whether they are American, European or African children?
Knowing the al-Qaeda operatives were in the village, why didn’t the Americas send in Special Forces to attack them? This would have minimised the loss of innocent lives. The answer is very simple - Black Hawk Down. The disastrous attack on Mogadishu in October 1993 and the subsequent humiliation for US troops has left a deep scar on the US psyche. No US General is going to sanction a similar mission. Attacks on Somali will be carried out at 30,000ft irrespective of the collateral damage.
Innocent men, women and children are being killed in Iraq, Afghanistan, Somalia and other countries, all in the name of the war against terrorism. Politicians say, “We are carrying the war to them”. In reality it means it’s acceptable to kill 1000 foreigners if it saves 1 life in the streets of London or New York.
What am I worth?
What level of collateral damage is justifiable, to ensure I am safe to walk the streets of London?
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