Not to plan

They say God has a sense of humour, He /She (or even They depending on your beliefs) must have, to give humans the ability to plan - and then to sit back and watch as things go to pot. Today’s Master Plan was to write a blog about World Icons. But 10.30 last night I received a phone call from a relative of a friend, inviting himself and his family for lunch.

So this morning Mrs YesBut pointed me in the direction of the market and gave me a push out into the cold 1st March air. Just arrived back, with chicken and fruit. Now drinking a hot cup of Lemmon & Ginger tea in the hope of worming up the old bones.

At this point I must wish you all a happy St David’s Day (Dydd Gwyl Ddewi)(the patron saint of Wales) .Today you must all wear a leak or a daffodile, the national emblems of Wales. In Wales little girls will be dancing and singing, wLearing the Welsh national costume.

So having wished you all Dydd Gwyl Dewi hapus, I must log off and help prepare to welcome our guests

Dysfunctional Britain

When I heard on the news yesterday that the weather forecast for today was 10cm (4“) of snow in Wales, the Midlands and South East England, I knew what I would be bogging about today. I was right, the first item on today’s news was the chaos caused by the snow: airports closed, schools closed, roads closed, interminable disruption on the railways, on the list goes.

Four inches of snow in most European countries would be regarded as a light shower, but in the UK it brings the country to a grinding holt. In previous years the excuse is “it was totally unexpected”. But no such excuse can be used today, there was adequate warning given yesterday. Lorries should have been out overnight gritting the roads and snow ploughs keeping the roads and railways open but evidently that is too much to expect.

I read with amusement the reaction of people on internet message boards. They report of going to supermarket to find shelves cleared of goods. Yes it’s the normal British reaction, panic buying. The first thing to disappear off the shelves is bread, followed by flour. “We can bake our own bread” - they ignore the fact that they haven’t baking tins, or have forgotten to buy yeast. The flour will be put in the cupboard to join the packets bought the last time we had snow - five years ago. And of course ‘The’ must buy item toilet paper - whatever the crises, you must have an adequate supply of toilet paper. Nuclear wars, hurricanes, floods, epidemics Britain will survive as long as there is a supply of toilet paper.

Why is it that this country can not cope with anything but mild weather? In the summer, if the temperature goes above 80ºF / 26Cº railway tracks buckle and the rail service comes to a grinding holt. A ban is imposed on watering gardens as there is a “drought” and we are likely to run out of water.

On first sight Britain looks a reasonably well governed and managed country, but it only takes 4” of snow to reveal the true level of incompetence which exists in all branches and at all levels of government.

The British army is sent to war with an inadequate supply of body armour and the wrong type of troop carries. There aren’t dedicated hospitals to treat injured soldiers. While the soldiers are away fighting, their families are housed in substandard housing.

The National Health Service would be a joke, except the inefficiency and incompetence results in patients suffering and premature death. Last week my wife was due to undergo Endoscopic Retrograde Cholangiopancreatography (ERCP), fortunately the doctor due to perform the procedure reviewed her records. “Why is this patient having ERCP?” There in the records was clear evidence that the procedure was unnecessary. But the doctor who ordered the procedure wasn’t to blame; at the time, the relevant information was missing from the file. So because of a missing piece of paper, my wife could have suffered the pain and discomfort of undergoing ERCP tests and exposed herself to the associated risks.

Every week for nearly a year, reports appear in the news of yet another mind boggling example of incompetence in the Home Office which is responsible for the police, prison, customs, immigration, etc services. Last week judges couldn’t give jail sentences to people found guilty of crimes because all the prisons were full.

We look critically at “Third World Countries” and deride their shortcomings at not being able to provide clean drinking water or a reliable electricity supply, but in reality Britain is just as much an Underdeveloped Country.

Charles Prince of Wales to breed Organic Dragons

Since it has become public knowledge that the Prince of Wales has purchased a Welsh farm,

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/...

the local rumour mill has been in full production.

It is believed the Prince will use the farm to breed organically reared Dragons.

The spokesperson for the Welsh Dragon Breeders Association (WDBA), Elvin Lewis (aged 49), stated:

“Since its establishment in 1986, the WDBA has been in the forefront of the Dragon conservation program. While there are still 30 breeding pairs in the Brecon Beacons, and it is rumoured that there are a few dragons living in remote inaccessible valleys in Snowdon, the main population of dragons can be found in number of farms located in the Upper Tywi Valley. We would welcome Prince Charles joining the Association, and consider there is commercial potential in establishing an organic dragon meat market.”.

WDBA’s enthusiasm is not shared by everyone. The Welsh Glacier Monitoring Unit (WGMU) in a press release state:

“It is a well known fact, that during the mating season, male dragons spout, at least 6 times per hour, 30 ft long flames from their nose. The artificially high concentration of male dragons in the Upper Tywi Valley, has resulted in an increase of 3 Deg. C in the annual average ambient temperature. This has resulted in an accelerated melting of Welsh Glaciers. This year the run off from the Llangadog Glacier together with the higher than average rain fall in August resulted in flooding of parts of the Lower Tywi Valley.”

One of the casualties of the flood was the Annual Virgins Dance. The dance thought to originate in ancient times, when a virgin was given as sacrifice to pacify the wroth of dragons roaming over the West Wales Mountains.

One of the dancers, Blodwyn Williams (aged 14), on hearing the dance had been cancelled, tearfully stated that she and her friends had been practicing for months, and had to wear chastity belts for three years to ensure they would participate in the dance. She said with the onset of winter, the poor TV reception and the chaffing of the belts, she feared she wouldn’t qualify to participate in next years dance.

A BBC spokesperson, categorically denied poor TV reception was due to transitional shock waves caused by low flying dragons. He stated that while TV transmission masts had not been designed to attenuate the effects of transitory shock waves, the conversion of Ferryside and Llanstephan to purely digital service had been pre-planned, and had nothing to do with low flying dragons.

Future neighbours of Prince Charles, John James John (aged 36) and his wife Gladys (aged 74) were pleased the Prince had purchased Llwynywormwood estate, they wished him well in his Bed & Breakfast business. Their only concern was “ if he does keep dragons we hope he will keep them under control, we have enough trouble with pigeons landing on our chimney”.