Back home is where I want to be

In the words of Paul Simon “Gee but it’s great to be back home”.

The last couple of days, posting the blog has been a challenge. Firstly I had to use a borrowed Apple Mac, which I am unaccustomed to - no right click, no scroll wheel and a whole set of keys either missing or different. But that was nothing compared to the problem caused by everything on screen being in Dutch. Even though I was logged into my own Google Blogger account it was all in Dutch. But things went from bad to worst, I must have clicked on the wrong key, for suddenly not only was everything in Dutch but in Russian Cyrillic alphabet!! From “Double Dutch” to “All Greek to me” in one fair swoop. What a nightmare.

Its great sitting here in front of my familiar PC, never again will I curse you when you freeze on me.

By necessity this is going to be a very short blog, having travelled by coach all last night I feel absolutely knackered. The French customs and immigration made us take all our luggage off the bus, and pass it through an x-ray machine. My hand luggage caused suspicion. I had to open it for inspection. You would think they had never seen a packet of mixed nuts and dried fruit before! After the French, the British had us all off the bus for yet another inspection of passports. There’s always a high probability of problems when you see a large percentage of passengers having to fill-in immigration card because they are non-European Union Nationals. And so it was last night a West African couple were questioned and requisitioned - result we missed the 05:29 Eurotunnel Shuttle and had to wait for the 06:49. The knock on effect being the coach encountered the London rush hour - slow crawl for the final 5 miles.

Enough enough, I’m off to bed.

YesBut its time to go home

Mrs YesBut is starting to pack her bag ready for the journey home tonight.

I’ve failed to acquire ear plugs, but remembered to buy an orange. So if a passenger starts snoring on the homeward journey, I’ll have a solution.

Because the coach starts from Amsterdam, it’s normally given extra special attention by the UK Customs and Immigration. Our passports will be examined by UK Immigration Officers based at Coquelles near Calais. Invariably most passengers don't hold European Union passports, so there is a lot of scrutiny. Last time we travelled, we were delayed for over an hour while a West African gentleman, searched through his luggage to find documents to prove the two year old child travelling with him was his son. Of course any delay means we miss the Eurotunnel shuttle, so the coach and passengers have to wait for the next train with free space. Fortunately this time of the year, the trains aren’t fully booked.

When we finally arrive at Folkestone, our passports will be examined yet again by UK Immigration. Then we will have to unload all our luggage, lug it into the Customs Hall. While it’s being examined sniffer dogs search the coach for drugs. I’m still waiting for some hippie type dude approaching me to ask “Help me out man, carry my guitar and this potted plant, I bought as a present for my dear old mother, through Customs for me”. It just goes to prove you shouldn’t judge a person by appearance. There I had assumed the long haired bearded individual was a drug smuggler, while all along he was a devoted son!

Last time I flew into Heathrow Airport, I was minding my own business walking through the “Nothing to declare channel“, when the passenger in front of me was stopped by Customs. He completely lost his cool and accused the Officer, “The only reason you have stopped me is because I’m black. You wouldn’t have stopped me if I was white”. It was just my luck! As a gesture and to shut the complaining passenger up, I was stopped and asked, very apologetically, to open my cases. I have no problem with being stopped, the only annoying thing is, despite the combined efforts of Mrs YesBut and myself we can never seem to get all the contents back into the cases! It’s really embarrassing trying to pack your underwear and things in public. I suppose it’s even more embarrassing for passengers who have purchased items from Amsterdam sex shops.

So its going to be another sleepless night tonight

Click here to see today’s image - others making their way home.